By: Patricia Darrow, Astrologer



Basic karma is the law of cause and effect. For every action, be it thought, word or deed, there is an equal reaction. As you sow…so you shall reap.

Balancing karma is paying off old debts and avoiding the creation of new ones.

First, everyone is born with situations that were created in past lives and which must be corrected in this one. Karmic situations exist between people if there are either strong bonds of love or hate towards each other. If you don’t have particular feelings about a person, chances are there is no karma between you and you won’t have to repeat a lifetime with them. Makes sense doesn’t it? Everyone has relationships (both positive and negative) that must be resolved.

In the case of strong hate between two people, the only way to resolve that situation is to forgive the person, deep within your heart (soul), for any real or imagined transgressions which may have passed between you. Then you must ask to be forgiven by God for your transgressions, real or imagined, committed against the other person. You need not ask the person directly for forgiveness or personally forgive them (although that would be a wonderful gesture of maturity). You just need to sincerely repent of your anger towards them. That will balance out the karmic scales between you and the debt(s) will have been paid.

In the case of strong bonds of love, it is a little more difficult. We all are looking for that supreme love…the love that transcends all barriers. Since we are but mere mortals, we look towards one another to fulfill that emotional need. There is the love between parent and child, husband and wife, friends, siblings or lovers. These relationships offer emotional strength, comfort, support, joy and sorrow. We tend to cling to them because the pleasure outweighs the pain that these relationships offer. There is nothing wrong with this…it brings joy to our hearts to be with these people (in most cases). However, this type of dependent love creates situations where the entities involved want to be together so much that the relationships can become very possessive. In this way, their insecurities and fears set up karmic situations which must be resolved before participants will be able to move on in their spiritual evolution.

In order to balance this karma, one needs to develop the detached attitude of "if you love someone, set them free". Don’t try to possess someone else; allow them to move and be as they will…not as you would have them be. This allows people to grow as souls and move on in their experiences. The only way to achieve that type of detached attitude is to turn towards God for He is the source of absolute love…a love so beautiful it makes the love between humans pale in comparison. Ask Him in prayer to fill your heart with His Love; pray constantly to be free emotionally from all attachments to the people you love. Inwardly pray for them to "live long and prosper" so that way you will break the karmic ties that bind you together lifetime after lifetime. Why, you may ask, would anyone want to do this if they truly loved another? Because you want to transmute that love from an emotional, physical love to the Divine Love that exists between God and His children. That type of love allows you to love everyone, not just a select few people. It will allow you to look upon anyone as you would your own children (lover, parent, sibling, etc.); thus, you would truly be able to "love your neighbor as yourself".

Now that we addressed the subject of breaking karmic ties, how does one NOT create new situations. Simply, by not developing strong bonds of either love or hate with anyone. If someone slights you (intentionally or not), forgive them in your heart and bless them. Don’t hold thoughts of malice, resentment, anger, envy, jealousy or revenge against that person. Those types of thoughts will attract negative situations to you and cause your life to be miserable. Plus, it will insure that you will have to repeat experiences again with that particular soul until you forgive them and the scales are balanced. For example, one woman I know has a brother who in previous lives (three to be exact) tortured, maimed and killed her. She really had to consciously work on forgiving him for these transgressions. He, on the other hand, had no clue that he had done this to her. Finally, she was able to release the anger (hurt, fear, etc.) and forgive him and asked God to forgive her for retaining that anger for so long. Now the debts are paid, and she won’t have to repeat lives with him again. Thus, they both have been released from an old debt, even though he didn’t have to do anything about it. The woman balanced out the scales for both of them.

In the case of loving another person, you may cherish them, be devoted to them but remember that you are only here to share life together…to enjoy the ride so to speak. You aren’t suppose to stay together for eternity. You are simply to enjoy one another and the life you create together. You are to allow the other person ample freedom to pursue their own desires and goals. You aren’t to possess them, hinder them or attempt to control them. You are to grow in your own unique ways, yet share your experiences with one another. It is the same thing with children. You are only to be their "temporary caretakers" until they are old enough to experience life for themselves. Sure, they are going to make mistakes, but you aren’t to manipulate them, force them to be what you want them to be. Otherwise, in another life, you will be on the other end of the stick…and probably won’t like it at all. Pray to God to give you the wisdom to guide your children and the love to set them free when the time comes. That is the best way to avoid creating new karmic bonds.

Remember, "to err is human…to forgive is divine". Start forgiving those people to whom you have developed karmic ties (in past lives as well as this present one). Let the people you love free emotionally. Remember, "if you love something, set it free…if it comes back to you, it is yours…if it doesn’t, it never was?" It will work wonders in their lives as well as your own.