Grandchild

In your eyes it seems to be the past is coming back to me

I remember in the things you do

I remember someone almost like you

He didn’t have your hair or her smile was not as wide

But resemblance is uncanny whether inside or outside

Its nothing I can put my finger on

It’s just reflections more than one

I love you for yourself that’s true

But still I see my child in you

The same yet different in my eyes

Within this the truth lies

Life goes forward never back

So lets love for tomorrow

With roots in the past

And not lose today, for it’s all we have.

"Life is a Test."

Life is only a test.

If this had been an actual life

You would have received further instructions

on where to go and what to do.

From GrandsPlace News

What Do We Tell the Kids?

There comes a time in each of our lives when the children we are raising looks around at other families and realizes that theirs is a difference. Then the questions start. One of the hardest questions is:

"Why don’t I live with my parents?"

The reason that question is hard is because we must always tell our children the truth but need to temper the truth with kindness. It would be so easy to just blurt out "Because there stupid druggies and they can’t stay sober long enough to remember to feed you!" That statement might but what you truly believe but what would that statement do to the child? A child would see that statement as saying that she is not good enough, smart enough, lovable enough for her own parents. She would see your anger in that statement and wonder that if she did something wrong you might stop loving her too. As a child grows she learns about biology and that she is half of each parent. If you tell her that one or more of her parents are bad then she feels that she must be too.

There is no pat answer to this question but here in our house we answer the question in the kindest terms available. We have told Danni that her parents have a handicap in their brain that prevents them from making the right kind of choices needed to keep her safe. We said that when we saw that Mommy and Daddy did not know how to take care of her we her grandparents took her to live with us so that she could grow up safe and happy. We said that both of them love her but that love is not enough.

This leaves Danni feeling loved, wanted and cherished by all of us. It gives Danni permission to love her bio parents as well as her parenting grandparents without feeling disloyal to any of us. It releases Danni from the burden of figuring out who is to blame for this situation. If a parent is handicapped he or she cannot be blamed for their misfortune and Danni does not have to think that her parents left her because there was something wrong with her.

Danni will be 5 years old on August 24^th. She does not need to know about the drugs or neglect or any other of the sins of her parents. What she needs to know is that she is beautiful and smart and that all of us are willing to work together to give her the best life possible. The handicapped theory works well for this.

Working Mom

You're not here all the time you know Mom that, that's true

But you work hard all the time to buy me things so new

Like clothes and food and toys some times and all the things needed

You tie my shoes and count to two and sit with me and read

For all the time that you're not there I miss you that is true

But you make up for it each day with all the things you do.

By Annette Johnson, Working Mom

We received this via e-mail

Stranger

I ran into a stranger as he passed by, "Oh excuse me please," was my reply. He said please excuse me too; wasn’t even watching for you. We were very polite, this stranger and I, we went on our way. And we said good-by.

But at home a different story is told. How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, cooking the evening meal, My daughter stood beside me very still, when I turned, I nearly knocked her down. "Move out of the way," I said with a frown. She walked away, her little heart broken. I didn’t realize how harshly I’d spoken.

While I lay awake that night in bed. God’s still small voice came to me and said, "While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use. But the ones you love, you seem to abuse."

Go look down on your kitchen floor, You will find flowers there by the door. Those are the flowers she brought for you. She picked them herself, pink, yellow and blue. She stood quietly not to spoil the surprise, and you never saw the tears in her eyes.

By this time, I felt very small and now my tears began to fall. I quietly went and knelt by her bed; "Wake up, little girl, wake up I said. "Are these the flowers you picked for me?" She smiled. "I found ‘em, out by the tree. I picked ’em because they ’er pretty like you. I knew you’d like ’em, especially the blue." I said’ " Daughter, I’m sorry for the way I acted today; I shouldn’t have yelled at you that way." She said, "Oh Mom, that’s Okay. Cause I sure love you anyway."

I said, "Daughter, I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

FAMILY

"People that don’t have nightmares don’t have dreams."

And a Special Thank You to all who have sent us items.

Jerry and Carol

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