Cracking

By Reverend Kinesys.

it can be especially so when one feels uncomfortable around "Normal" people and feels isolated. It can be hard to be considered freakish or bizarre. Have you ever felt that you had something to contribute if only someone would listen...If only you could get your point across.? Sometimes the only way to hang on can be to throw yourself into that which has always been your haven be it role-playing games or computers or even science...

By the way, did I mention that I'm talking about the Sons of Ether?

I was watching Real Genius, One of my favorite Ethericly flavored movies, when it occurred to me that many of us might be missing a real good thing in terms of role-playing. When Chris tells the story about Laszlo "cracking" from the pressure and from not realizing that his work was killing people I began to see possibilities.

It is plain to me that when will workers crack they usually don't do it quietly. Euthanatos go on killing sprees, Hermetics get megalomaniacal, Akashics withdraw from the world, Dreamspeakers start to think that maybe the Unabomber has the right idea, Virtuals go crazy in any number of ways, and everybody has the potential for marauderdom.

Ah, but it's Etheric Mages I'm talking about today. Each of us can understand that maybe instead of being the Comic relief that we have come to expect of them, that maybe they are really tragic figures who struggle and strive for acceptance in the only way they can understand.

I'm going to use our common experiences for a moment if that's O.K. I don't think that it's elitist to say that an interest in role-playing games requires a certain amount of intellect so maybe we all share commonalties in growing up...Like;

1) Some of us grew up to be much more intelligent than our parents.

2) We learned very early on that the other kids weren't like us. they never seemed to get tired of pointing it out to us in that Lord-Of-The-Flies way that young children have.

3) Being different, we learned very early on to hate and fear other people for what they could do to us. this made it more difficult to learn any kind of social skill later. (lest you think that I'm making a case that all gamers are some kind of misanthrope, let me simply say that Role-playing games can teach you social skills if you think of it and try it out. I've known people to gain a measure of social grace this way. it happens... It's Battletech gamers that got the REAL problems. :)

(actually, I should probably point out that's just a joke...for the humor impaired.)

4) We found ourselves more able to deal with adults even though they rarely took us seriously.

5) Having a sharp and flexible mind is not necessarily a key to success in any field. How many times did you hear this as a child? "I don't understand you. You could really make something of yourself if YOU JUST APPLIED YOURSELF!" I never could explain to mom and dad that my mind never wanted to sit still for the academic busywork they were trying to shove down my throat. It bored the shit out of me that I was so far ahead of my peers.

6) You find yourself having less and less in common with...everybody.

7) You find yourself reanimating dead pets...(O.K. maybe that's just me.)

8) You really think about things,instead of breezing through life on autopilot like most.

9) You really See things that everybody else seems to miss...and it frustrates you to the point of madness...the sheep-like nature of most folks.

10) You pick everything apart. ideas,religions,social structures,machinery,friends...

11) You find yourself putting more and more of yourself into your work or art because the rewards it gives you almost compensate for everything you have to give up.

Most Etherics have to walk in these self same shoes. Many of them, a long time before they awaken. Some Crack. Some give in to bitterness,despair,sexual dysfunction, Delusions of grandeur, and other even less attractive psychosis. Some might even try to give up Science altogether and withdraw from the world.( a concept for a Son Of Ether house painter comes to mind.) Even among other Mages they are often the odd men out. Most Mages consider the Etherics a few bricks shy of a load anyway and rarely take them seriously. This even might be bearable if not for the fact that Etheric Mages can't even get along with one another.They compete with one another and often go out of their way to make trouble for, and sabotage each other. There doesn't even seem to be the "little brother" mechanism that's present among the virtuals.( I.E. "he's my little brother and I'll pick on him all I want...but if YOU pick on him,I'll FUCKIN KILL YOU!")

So they Crack...They become bitter or withdrawn. they become cynical and paranoid.

they might develop substance abuse problems,(a real problem for Mages so skilled with Matter.) I think that Etheric Mages have more potential for real tragedy than perhaps any other type of Mage. It makes you think that maybe all those lab explosions aren't accidents.

While relentless curiosity is one of the main reasons that they deal with others at all,and keeps them driven and passionate, It is still not a substitute for real human contact. Etheric Mages like to have the intellectual pose down but it cannot disguise the fact that they are at basis very passionate about their work. and that science has become, in every sense of the word, both their aesthetic and religion. When this passion is turned in on itself or when the faith is lost....it is never pretty. Ask any Chorus Mage.

So they Crack....Severely.

-They withdraw from people and reality(go marauder)

-They run away from their problems,or their intellect (there isn't anything sadder than an Etheric Mage with a drinking problem.)

-They stop caring about anything other than their work.(like whether or not the work is the perversion of the natural order or will kill millions of people...)

-Or worse, they decide that the best way to get what they hunger for is to deal with the Nephandi.

Funny? Maybe. Comic relief? Sure.

Tragic?

You tell me.