"Mauled! Can't...soak!"

Jimmy Howard reacting badly to pun damage.

"I sense a disturbance in the yard."

-Kerry, getting a little Jedi on us.

"I have everybody's mind on speed dial."

Jasmine dealing with a flustered Damian during their first mental contact.

"You all should just snog and get it over with!"

-Damien, remarking on Jasmine and Tyler's sexual tension.

"Listen to me very carefully Damien. Whatever you do, do not have sex with that Demon."

-Ivan, Secretly hoping that Damien won't listen.

"Well we got an Angel, a Demon, a guy who sees dead people...uh...a dead person."

-The Half Team giving Damien the lowdown on the place.

"I'll see you later guys. we've got some..." "....Luggage to pack?"

-Kerry, Finshing Ivan's sentence for him as regards him sneaking off with Corrina.

" Hey man. Not everybody at this table is supernatural you know? Be cool."

-Ivan, trying to preserve some normalcy at the table.

"Oh sure! Throw time travel in my face!"

-Ivan pissed at Jasmine for pointing out that technically he did cheat on Melanie before they broke up.

"Well you did make it a fetish. And i do mean a fetish."

-Kerry commenting on Ivan's method of Demon disposal.

"That would be the tarot equivalent of "Well DUH!"

- Ivan, commenting on the cards.

"Jasmine tends to play her cards close to her chest whereas you would probably have some sort of difficulty..."

-Ivan, trying to explain the inner mysteries of Jasmine to Corrina.

"I would like to point out that i do not spontaneously do anything! That takes effort. That takes MATH!"

-Jasmine, getting riled.

"Should i get pin to pop that ego of yours?" "You might actually want to get a pick." "No I don't want to do that, the fallout might affect people for 50 miles. I don't want to involve innocents."

-Jasmine and Ivan trading barbs.

Chapter 24:

"Some of us have a lower threshold of exciting than you." "Yeah, and I been meaning to ask you about that..."

Kerry and Ivan (I think)

"Trouble is not the only thing that's coming..."

Ivan, Master of debauchery.

"The Serpent at the base of my spine is not only uncoiling, it's doing the macarena."

Ivan, Pleased that the ritual is going well.

"There could be clinging. What we want here is cling-free sister and ...homey."

Kerry, unduly upset about the prospect of Brandon and Tenna at the party together.

"Take a cold shower...approximately 3 degrees kelvin."

Kerry, worked up into a tizzy.

"Hmmm....Demons of the void....damn i wish these things had indexes."

Ivan, decrying the poor state of demonological scholarship.

"I knew that would get her goat.."I think that's actually gotten her entire barnyard."

Jenna and I making an OOC comment about Stacy

"So what are you saying to me? Are you saying to me that the Peter Principle applies to Hell?" "Of course Hell is a bureacracy...What were YOU thinking?"

Ivan talking to Charissa about infernal matters.

Chapter 23:

"Mental Note: Invent Girl."

-Kerry, with a serious case of blue balls.

"I brought the magick suitcase..."

-Ivan, while sneaking away with Corrina.

"What is you're problem with me sneaking off to knock boots with my girl?" It's not that that i object to. it's just...Why do you have to bring luggage into it?

-An exchange between Kerry and Ivan...about the Magick Suitcase.

"Aw C'mon. I know you were listening in."

-Jasmine being busted again by Melanie.

"This Campus needs an Enema!"

-Ivan, channeling Jack Nicholson.

" Oh sure, they may be more powerful than us. They may know way more about us than we do about them. They may outnumber us significantly. They may be older and more experienced. and they may have greater resources and mobility than us. but we have one thing that they don't.....AUDACITY!"

-Ivan,trying to rouse the troops.

" I am NOT going to be any entities cat toy!"

-Ivan, Vowing vengenace on Mala.

"I've never been cynical before...and i'm not even 10."

-Jasmine,horrified at the state of her life.

" Is it supposed to do that?" "No...."

-Ivan and Tyler, right before the stupid thing went off

"That might be the infernal forces you ordered." "At least they're punctual."

Jasmine and Ivan

" It was a good idea...I just didn't know i was gonna get carved on."

Ivan, bitching again.

"In my opinion. The Devil is simply not thinking big enough."

Ivan, waxing eloquent

"Do you know any Technocrats?" "Yes." "Can we borrow them?"

Vincent asking Mikhail for help

"I've always wanted to become raw intellect. It would certainly save time getting dressed in the morning."

Jasmine, Musing.

"Guys There's some Evil outside!"

-Jasmine,being the early warning system.

" You can probably tell I don't come from a traditional Christian background."

-Ivan, trying unsuccessfully to upset the nun.

" No other Virtual Adept had better see me do this."

-Jasmine, doing something really embarassing

"What are they doing?" "Oh I don't know something about some THING coming through a gate or whatever...." "Shit. I never get to do anything fun."

-Tyler, left out of family business again.

" DEATH BY CUTLERY!"

-Ivan, congratulating himself a touch too soon.

" HEY! This is a Burundi wand! What are they doing with this laid out on the coffee table? This is like pure concentrated evil!"

-Ivan, scandalized by the household tchochkes.

" My entropy is working overtime."

-Ivan, tweaked about his up and down luck.

"Haagen Dasz! The wonder medicine...but only if used as directed."

-Melanie showing wisdom beyond her years

"I'm fine. I have taken mushrooms before....and I'm more experienced at this sort of thing than you are...Isn't that right Mr. Sock?"

-Ivan Crowley, Cranial explorer at large.

"Oh god! The Vampires are gonna blow up Dick Clark! " " Are you stoned?" "Not anymore!"

-Jasmine on the phone with her father

"I'm basking in your genius. Oh please...get me suntan oil...SPF 1,000,000 with extra bullshit protectant."

-Jasmine attempting to out-sarcasm Ivan

" I think it would be a good idea if nobody got shot at this party."

-Jasmine, making a list of thing that shouldn't happen at the party.

" His head looks like it was stove in with a hammer...what do you think happened?" "Well..I'd say that he said the wrong thing at the wrong time to the guy with the hammer."

-Tyler and Ivan at the crime scene.

"I don't think of her as a woman. I think of her as a force of nature."

-Ivan, referring to Corrina

"...And on the 8th day GOD said..."Let there be Mosh!"

-Tyler, high on Ecstasy.

" Suck all the fun out of it why don't you."

-Ivan, being a crank.

"French Cooties!"

-Said by all the players at once.

"There is no pan deader than mine."

-Pete, explaining that Ivan has his most serious mug on.

"Wait..wait! We don't have to flee. We're tourists remember...Oh look. there's a burning building let's tour over this way..."

-Vincent,suggesting an excellent plan.

"Will it interact badly with chocolate?"

-Melanie,always asking the tough questions

"But I don't want to be an infernal being!"

Andrael,concerned over her spiritual status.

"I don't know about you but I'd rather not be naked in front of the angel."

-Ivan, showing a bit of uncharacteristic modesty.

"I'm going to go home and shtup a role model."

-Ivan, said with the biggest shit-eating grin in the world.

" Last time I tried be cryptic....Fuck Cryptic."

Katey O'Hara Cabrell, Not messing around.

"The clown suit make everything different."

-Jasmine, (I'm not even going to tell what this is about.)

"She's going to suck his Q!"

-IIRC, Jenna having some fun at my expense.

"Now, we just need to stay calm and act perfectly norm -- Oh my GOD, is

that my CAR?"

-- Tyler, trying unsuccessfully to pass as his adult self in the future

"Wow, that age thing has you screwed both ways -- or rather, NOT screwed."

-- Adult Ivan, needling Adult Jasmine about being stuck in a 9-year-old

body while her husband was hornier than he'd been in years

"It's like an evil welcome wagon..."

-Jasmine,(Can't remember why.)

"If we don't kill em. they won't learn nothing."

-Said by every player at some point.

"Fucking Time travel! We're going to have to invent a new verb tense."

-Ivan,Having a thorazine moment.

" I am the Capi di Tutti Candy."

-Jasmine, insufferably proud of her candy gathering prowess.

(Spooky voice) "I am a Magickal being...Take of your Bra!"

-Ivan, Showing why he's so popular with the ladies.

"Oh he was counseling her alright...Counseling her tonsils!"

-Melanie,Pissed off

"Hey, if you give her an inch she'll take a mile." "I'm not planning to give her just an inch."

-Tyler and Ivan speaking affectionately about Corrina.

"Let me put my money in my underwear and we'll investigate."

-Ivan, being cautious

"He was killed in a freak Morris Dancing mishap."

-Ivan,goofing.

"I'm not repressed. I'm 9!"

Jasmine at the end of her patience with Ivan

"The walls are bleeding...That's not good sign."

-Melanie,showing her iron grasp of the obvious

"To the supernatural, Halloween is lot like Labor day. it's a good day to take off."

-Ivan, content to let the amatuers chew up the turf.

"My kung-fu never works."

-Jasmine,Botching again.

"Could you be bit more cryptic and elliptical?"

-Jasmine, being cranky.

"Like we're gonna get killed at the mall..."

-Tyler,being optimistic.

"We'll have to do this Mission Impossible Style...and this time let's actually plan it."

-Ivan, bemoaning the lack of organization.

"Can you believe this? The Password was GOD."

-Jasmine,relishing the naivete of lesser beings.

"Oh yes please...Make me safe and comfy.

-Ivan,in response to the new rules and regulations.

"Oh THANK YOU lady kung-fu master!"

-Ivan being properly respectful to Mia Walters.

"Can we find something a little more Brittany Spears and a little less Winnie the Pooh."

-Corrina, style consulting for Jasmine

"Omigod! I have become Wesley Crusher!

-Jasmine, having a long dark tea-time of the soul.

"Well...She can easily be sacrificed to the dark god."

-Jasmine,Saying something she will keenly regret later.

"Jasmine....when a mommy computer and daddy computer love each other very much they share a special kind of....interface."

-Ivan, about to get smacked.

" If everybody gets electrocuted..well, that won't be a fun party."

-Ivan, adding another item to the "Don't let this happen at the party" list.

"Suck up the Guilt!"

-Ivan, sticking it Jasmine for wrecking his relationship with Mel.

"Killed is not what we will be."

-Ivan, enjoying his own language.

" I am definitely NOT Jesus."

-Ivan,walking on water.

"Schoolwork! I forgot we do that."

-Jasmine, remembering the whole school thing.

"Um, I'm a little new at this hell-raising thing..."

-Simon, new to planning big parties.

"Should you still be bleeding?"

-Jasmine, concerned about Tyler

"Death is not exactly Disneyland."

-Tyler,attempting to be sage-like.

" Oh dear...the pot-roast...we have to leave."

-Ivan, realizing he desperately needed to be elswhere.

"You know...i came to school to learn stuff...but this..."

-Melanie,after getting the big spiel.

"People are really confusing...especially the dead ones."

-Simon, stating something obvious (to him)

"If you're going to massacre my language at least kill it quickly and have done!"

-Ivan, decrying the lingustic boullibase that Brandon insists on speaking.

"Brandon, I don't know how to break this to you but ...You're White."

-Tyler, trying to break it gently.

"You realize of course that we're destroying an innocent life here....(Followed by 20 minutes of giggling.)

-Ivan and Jasmine

"Um...if it doesn't have blinky lights on it, I'm not really your girl.

-Jasmine, showing the limits of her abilities.

"Do you think this is not a secure line?

-Nightshade, hurt and offended.

"I'm British. We don't tweak."

-Ivan, after being tweaked.

" I believe "Honky Motherfucker" is the common parlance..."

-Ivan, soaking up the native idiom.

" I've heard it said that those who wear black clothes tend to have a lot of unexpressed aggression...do you know what I say? Fuck those people!"

-Ivan, in one of his moods.

" I'm the king of modesty."

-Ivan, for obvious reasons.

"No! There will be no mojo stealing here!"

-Ivan concerned over the route the conversation was taking.

"That last statistical analysis just eliminated everybody from my list of suspects and strongly suggested Big Bird....Big Bird doesn't even wear pants."

-Jasmine,botched again.

"Oh my god. I just look insufferably cute."

-Jasmine, turning on the cute like a searchlight.