Quotes

This whole section is actually inspired by the McGuffin Homepage. I've been keeping a list of the best quotes from the games I've been running for a few years and I thought I'd put them up just for a amusement sake.Credits are below.

-"Mr. Clarke is making an Eeevil werewolf school!"

-"You can't handle the truth!"

-"OK. picture your very worst nightmare, magnify it a thousand times...it's in that bathroom!"

-"Don't sass me." (spoken to a live chicken)

-" Who the hell are you?" "We're the dead people."

-" You know I always thought school lunch was a vehicle for wyrm corruption."

-" Fucked by the magic 8 ball!"

-"The Wombat Cometh..."

-"Why are you looking through a dead girls underwear drawer?" "Underwear can tell you a lot about a person.

-"Nietzsche wasn't just whistling Dixie."

-"Hey...Some of those people aren't wearing underpants!"

- "No no no. you shouldn't risk your life. we're supposed to be the ones that stand against evil threats like this...that's what they taught us in Werewolf School."

-"You better start talking fast if you want your nipple back."

-" My ass is at least functional."

-"Why do you snort powdered drink products?"

- I don't believe this...my son turns into a big fucking bird...Why couldn't you just be on drugs or gay!"

-(Greek chorus) "...And one time, at band camp.."

-(after a long pause)"...PENIS!"

-" I don't know whether you noticed or not but we see to be in the neck risking business."

-" Don't be Crow!"

-"Never enough orifices!"

-"the bad guys are getting away.what do you do?" "I take my monkey and hide in the trunk of his car."

-"Daddy, What's a Faggot?"

-" You've never planned an attack before have you? " Goddamnit! why does everybody keep asking that?"

-" I've never fired a torpedo before....sounds like fun."

-"this is sort of like that "remote pissing" rote you came up with.

- "I'm a Mage I've got to have a trenchcoat around here somewhere."

-"It's completely logical,except for the fact that it doesn't make sense."

-"Your problem is that if you're going to be a criminal you've got to learn to think like a criminal. if you plan to be any good at it you're going to have to learn to think like a cop too."

-"I keep telling you. I'm not a pimp. I'm a Romance broker."

-"Now why can't we be organized like the bad guys are?"

-" What are you talking about? This is perfectly good money.It's been laundered and everything."

-"I think it's interesting. it'll be a nice change of pace for the criminals to watch the cops for a change."

-"Are you done pissing at the borders of you territory?"

-"I am God!"

-"I absolutely refuse to believe that this world shattering plot has originated in Nebraska."

-"Let's get outta here so I can wash my hand."

-"Would you relax! you're already implicated."

-"You may not want to believe it. but there is such a thing as a necessary evil."

-"He kicked my cat. He has to die."

-"Excuse me, are you dead?"

-"I'm just doing this to help your concentration." "I concentrate fine, you're just doing this because you are a sadist." "that too.">CRACK<

-" So...how is Paul?" "Distant."

-"There are times when he's about as subtle as a tactical nuke out."

-"Would you be so kind as to return these handcuffs to the nice young lady on the dance floor."

-"HO VILLAINS! TASTE MY STEEL!"

-"Don't I look spooky and all-knowing?"

"Well...I've been dead before."

-"Remember.You're my bitch.

-"There are worse ways to die." "Sure. but this isn't the way I had picked out."

-"I'm Correspondence boy. I don't use phone anymore."

-"Werewolves in New York? Puhl-leeze!"

-" So let me get this straight...were just going to knock on the front door and then defend ourselves."

-"I'm a Homicide detective you moron! I'm here to detect the Homicide! Look, There it is!"

-"Scars are unimportant. it just means you were slow..or stupid." (said by a werewolf)

-"I think he's gatorshit right about now."

-"Vampires and Werewolves and Mages...oh My!"

-"NOBODY tells me access denied!"

-"What are you going to do?" " That would require a degree in metaphysics to explain."

-"let me see if I understand you correctly. You ...broke.. a realm?"

-"You know, You are more adept at winning games you know nothing about than anyone I've ever met."

-"Do you make a living scaring the hell out of me?"

-"They don't teach you about ghosts in the police academy?"

-"Hey that was almost a compliment. Maybe I should nearly get killed more often."

-"I am the soul of discretion."

-"I have an irrational fear of Post-it notes."

-" There is messing with the wrong crowd and there is messing with the wrong crowd."

-"He's in Kansas. Thinking it over. Kansas is a good place to think it over."

-"I saw you in my vision." "I hope I wasn't in the shower."

-"I did not suggest this plan to her regardless of what you might think."

-"Righteous wrath of god? Got that right here."

-"Oh dear. I feel a beat poem coming on...fetch me some bongos and a flautist."

-"Well, at least the bloodstains came out."

-"Goddamn Technocracy basements!"

-"You called me in here for a cooking emergency?"

-"Well I don't like evil. Evil is bad."

-"When you say bloodsucking vampires, you aren't talking about lawyers are you?"

-"Sounds like a case of spiritual constipation."

-"Well I never said it was a good plan."

-"No! You don't want to mess with these guys! They got Tounges."

-" I can't go back to having sex the dumb way. it's just no fun."

-" Sorry I'm a little distracted." "Oh yeah? Well I'm a little charred."

-"Yoohoo! Mister Ugly Man! PBBBLT!"

-"You're always down on the Illegal stuff. Why is that?"

-"A true warrior makes war only out of love,not out of fear or anger...Shumck!"

-"I've never interviewed the victim in a murder investigation before."

-"We're not going to get all touchy-feely now are we?"

-"Big gigantic morphing creatures aside."

-"did everybody pee before we left."

-" So where did you get shot?" "In battle."

-"Let's see you get a tree metaphor out of that."

-"Oh bite me!" "Careful he might construe that as an invitation."

-"Oh I still think you are a creature of darkness. I just don't think you are a scum sucking creature of darkness."

-"So I'm pithy. Sue me."

-"I feel somehow soiled."

-"We should hurry. I believe he's being eaten."

-"Hey I got an idea why don't we call the police...BWAHAHAHAHA."

-"Am I sterile now?"

-"Do you know what Putz actually means?"

-" Hey, I am cruising damnit!"

-" Seething whirlpool of entropy, why you're soaking in it."

-" But you are the law!" "No, I am only a tiny ,tiny, piece of the law."

-"So...Who is your dead friend."

-" When a Wiccan tells you to take vitamin C. You do it you understand."

-"What are you so nervous for? you wore underwear didn't you?"

-"Man, I've got to stop feeding off the bums around the V.A. hospital."

-"You don't have a doctor's hands." "Actually I do,but they're at home."

-" I don't think I care for all this casual talk about killing." "Well. How would you prefer we talk about it."

-"Oh my god! You just gave me a ludicrous amount of money."

-"Oh THOSE books....Well, yeah... we do have those books."

-"We should try get him up to speed." "O.K. How fast do you want him going?"

-" Come on give me some credit, it's not like I came or anything."

-"They shot my car!"

-"my entire posterior has turned blue."

-" Let's go." "We can't." "Why." "We're waiting for Nephandi." ">Groan<."

-" In the old days, you had a sword and you went among the peasants and dispensed justice damnit!"

-"We are actually very competent assholes thank you very much."